I can't decide if I should feel hopeful or not about this cycle. Am I PG? Or not? Part of me just wants to decide in my head one way or the other and just act as if...
I've been more in the "act as if I'm not" camp lately. Not that I'm drinking wine and coffee. I decided earlier in the 2WW to go ahead and exercise - not run a marathon, but go to the gym and get my heart rate up (not above 140 tho). During my IVFs, it was like walking on egg shells. This time I'm just living life.
The other reason I'm taking the "act as if I'm not" approach is that I've always lowered my expectations so I won't be so disappointed. Until IF, this has worked very well for me. I would work hard, do everything I could to make something happen (apply to colleges, jobs, etc.) and then basically offer up to the universe "Do whatever is best for me" with the caveat "Including something I might not have thought of myself."
IF just proves how little control we do have over our lives, our situations. We had no control about which families we were born into. Often our lives are mapped out for us by our family situations and expectations. Whether we get a raise or not is not up to us, someone else has to make the decision, put the money in the budget, recognize our talents.
I have two cheap dollar-store HPT at home, but Mr. Jem doesn't want me to POAS. Our beta is on Sunday. Only thing keeping me from testing is the heartbreak of a negative.
So, my questions for you, dear readers. are: Do you POAS? What type of HPT do you use?