Friday, August 24, 2012

Rosie is 17 weeks? Already? Really?

Holy cow, time flies!

Things have been up and down - mostly up. Motherhood rocks, better than I could have imagined. Rosie is a joy. That smile alone melts my heart.

Okay, enough unicorn farts. Reality? 

First issue: I wish she slept more. 

She hasn't been napping and that has been affecting her night-time sleep - waking more often. So we started sleep school today. Didn't go on a walk with local moms, just concentrated on napping. 

Two hours after she woke I tried putting her in her crib for her morning nap. Epic fail. Tons of crying. Instead I rocked her and sang to her and ended up nursing her to sleep. Which is what I have been doing every night.  The "twins" are a bit sore, to say the least.

Rosie slept in my arms for a couple of hours. I slept too. I'm tired. Living off five hours of sleep (total) is hard. I've been breast-feeding her on demand and plan to continue this, but the sleep thing has to happen. During the day and at night. Must. Sleep. More.

Second issue: to go back to work or not. I've been agonizing over what to do. It's a hard issue, deeply psychologically, emotionally and financially scary. I could write a whole post just on this topic. Maybe I will, but I'm so busy with this parenting thing, that I can't really promise to. The bottom line is that we can afford for me to stay home with Rosie, if we tighten our belts - living in the San Francisco Bay Area is expensive. I've yet to actually tell my boss that I'm not coming back. Scary. Except that all I want to do is stay home with her. My commute to work was one hour each way. I can't imagine doing my job, commuting and coming home to take care of the house and spend time with the kidlet, wake in the night to nurse her, etc. I know I could do it if necessary. But if I don't really have to...

Okay, better go sleep because Rosie is sleeping (not on me for once).

Do know that just because I don't post often, I am reading your blogs and thinking of all of you.



Mrs. Misfits said...

I have been thinking of you so often. We were discussing our alternate ljves in SF and commutes. The Mr. would have faced the same and it would have been unbearable. I am hoping that something that will work for you will pop up.

Sleep! Gar. E has connected evening hours, but no daytime for the most part. If I am lucky, I can get her swaddled and nurse for a nap on the bed. Those one hour naps are divine for both of us. If she weren't so miserable, I would probably give up on even trying. There has been some progress just this week on getting her at the first yawn and sticking to the bounce and sing ritual. I wish you some sleep and for dear Rosie to love naps. They are a joy of childhood!

KC said...

Wow, I am going through the tough decision of whether to go back to school or not. I can't imagine putting my boys in daycare for the extra couple of hundred dollars I would make teaching. I just don't get how we can make it work on one salary. Ugh, I hate making tough decisions.
As for the napping I can also relate. I have been following a sleep website and they gave me a lot of great advice. From what they told me at 17 weeks Rosie might not be able to last 2 hours awake. My boys are 6 months and they can only stay up 1.5 hours. The first yawn rule is good too because sometimes they don't even make it for an hour and a half. If we see them rub their eyes or yawn we put them down before the 1.5 hour mark. We were having a really hard time with naps so we also did a modified "sleep training". I would go in every 10-15 minutes (I never increased the time increments because I couldn't hear them fuss for longer than 15 minutes) and rock and calm them. Then I would put them down as soon as they were calm again. It was exhausting but now I place them in their crib and they roll onto their side and go right to sleep. I find that the first nap of the day is critical and my boys only last between 45 mins and an hour before they need to go down for that first anap. Another rule I follow is that they stay in their crib for a minimum 1.5 at a time. So if they wake earlier I do the same thing as when they were falling asleep (go in every 15 minutes).
Good luck

JNS said...

Oh my gosh, I remember that time! They are not good nappers at that age. Two suggestions: 1) try to get her back in a swaddle if you've abandoned it and 2) put her down for naps in her car seat and see if that helps. Both of those really helped my daughter nap.

About going back to work, yeah, that commute plus work is too much. Load up on life insurance on Mr. Jem then go for it! I don't think that you will ever regret staying home with your daughter.

Marianne said...

I let my daughter nap in my arms till about 6 months :-/ only way she would nap! She now naps independently but in our bed - she HATES her crib :-)

Anonymous said...

Ugghhh, sleep! I remember those days. It's so hard to navigate when you're sleep deprived! I'll send my "sleepy" thoughts to Rosie.

I don't have any advice on the work stuff. But, I know that commute is killer, having done something similar when I was younger.

My thoughts are with you. And, I'd love to get Cadet and Rosie together for a playdate when you're up for it!!

Mrs. Gamgee said...

The work stuff is hard. Even tho I knew I wasn't going to go back at the end of my mat leave, actually writing the letter and taking it in to my boss was very scary.

I wish I could offer some great advice on the sleep front. Sending prayers for a good night's rest for both you and Rosie!

Allison said...

Jem!! So good to hear from you! If you dont want to go back to work and can swing it, go for it! I hope the sleep gets better soon. Its tough, fo sho.

Kelly Graham said...

I wish my Little Man slept more, too. He's more of a power-napper for 15 to 20 minutes.

The commitment to stay home with her is a tough one, I'm sure. Finding affordable, quality childcare isn't easy -- M and I realized that $2k a month is pretty standard for infants, and that is basically the netpay from a $45k a year job.

On the other side, keeping company with an infant 24/7 does take it's toll. With a job you get to have adult conversations on a regular basis :)

Good luck.

Rebecca said...

Happy 17 weeks from my 17 week boys! :)

I know what you mean about sleep. We're getting better about forcing the naps during the day because it tends to make night a little easier. But, man, I wish nights were longer...