dIUI: CD 8 U/S#3

Just have time for a quick update. I have 2 presentations at work today.

U/S report: Follicles are progressing nicely: Right Ovary: 12 follicles: 10-17 mm. Left Ovary: 7-14mm. The other big news is my lining: now up to 7.6mm - Yippee! Anything greater than 7mm is good. There is no scientific study that saying that you need more than 7. Plus, my u/s Tech said she got pregnant when her lining was 6.4. She said something interesting. She said, "Plus, if it's meant to be, all these small details don't matter." I'm hoping she's right.

We will know this afternoon if I trigger today (hopefully) so we can do the IUI on Sunday. Also, I imagine we will get the "multiples talk" from Dr. W. Hey, I just want ONE live baby. I can't even contemplate multiples right now. There's part of me that says, "Wouldn't twins be nice? Two for the price of one?" while the other part is saying, "La, la, la, I can't hear you!" while covering her ears, like a 5-year-old child.

I'm a little scared because I feel so darn positive about this cycle. I'm not doing acupuncture or listening to relaxation tapes. I'm basically living my life, doing what I normally do (except without caffeine and eating better - more veggies, more organics, less sugar). Heck, like the u/s Tech said, if it's meant to be, it will happen. If not this cycle, the next (or the next?).

~Jem

6dp5dt: Moxa

Thank you all for your encouraging comments on yesterday's post. Getting my feelings out there really helped me process them and now I feel I can actually free up some of my little gray cells to focus on other things, like work (that pays my mortgage and insurance) and actually enjoy work! I love what I do and have lost sight of that over the last couple of months. I feel a little panicked right now because I've allowed myself to get behind on projects. Nothing to do but jump right back in, right?

Tonight I leave work early to go to acupuncture. At my last appointment he could tell right away that I wasn't doing my moxa enough. I had only done it once a day, rather than twice. That scared me and I got Mr. Jem to be more supportive (he thinks it's all hooey) and have been doing the moxa religiously at  home. 

What's moxa? I thought I had posted a whole thing on this for a previous cycle and would able to just point you there, but alas I could not find the post (where did it go?). So moxa is...

I like the way this website described it (click to see a picture of what it looks like):

"Moxibustion is the application of heat to a specific area or point on the body. Along with acupuncture needles, moxibustion has become an integral part of the Oriental system of medicine. The term 'moxibustion' is derived from the Japanese 'Moe Kusa', meaning 'burning herb'. Moxa is obtained from the herbal plant 'Arternisia Vulgaris', also commonly called mugwort."

The important thing is that moxa is supposed to bring additional blood flow to the uterus. 

Okay, back to work!

~Jem

My last nerve

Despite the title of this post, things are looking up in the Jem household. Yesterday my IVF nurse re-drew my circles for my PIO IM injections. Our clinic is very "in the box" and was not willing to give me other options, so I'll continue doing the shots for as long as possible AND I'm going to like it, dammit! When I described my back-side pain problem to my acupuncturist, she said, "It sounds like the injections were too close to your sciatic nerve. That's why it was so painful!"

That makes perfect sense. Now that the circles are closer to the side of my body, rather than closer to my spine, things are going much better. Injection last night didn't hurt a bit. Maybe this is just because it's going into new real estate. Who cares. It didn't hurt. I also iced less (only 5 minutes) and then followed the injection with 15 min with the heating pad. No, Poppet, hot baths are verboten for us PUPO (pregnant until proven otherwise) or PG (pregnant) gals.

Acupuncture was blissful last night. It felt like I was floating. Again, she said I had a good strong pulse, right on target for being PG, but not strong enough for triplets (whew!). As we transferred three embies, I did have some anxiety about this. The first couple of days after transfer I was convinced I was having multiples, given all the twitching and stretching was going on in my nether regions at that time.

I woke up this morning and did a body scan relaxation exercise and feel terrific today. Only symptoms: occasional warm pressure down there close to where my legs meet my torso, sore boobies (only with direct pressure, like if my 20 lb cat Fluffy jumps on me when I'm on the couch!). I still have some sciatic pain on the left cheek and tenderness if I palpate the old injection site, but it's much less than a couple of days ago. No more crying.

Thanks to all of you who wrote with support and ideas. I'm doing much, much better today physically and mentally. I'm in this zen space. I'm fine with the wait until tomorrow's beta. It just means that the little one(s) growing in side me will be that much more ready. Like I wrote in response to Kate's post about battling urgency, instead of "hurry up and wait" my new motto is, "No hurry, No wait." I choose to be in the moment and just let what happens tomorrow happen.

Earthquake!

Night and day difference between the fresh cycle transfer and the frozen:

Fresh transfer (Nov): me alone (Mr. Jem had a class he couln't miss and he felt totally guilty about not being there), Dr. Alternative (not my normal doctor) doing the transfer. I'm totally overstimulated, feel like I have a little of puppies in my belly. Difficult transfer (like a very painful pap smear). Two embies transfered. BFN.

Today's FET: me, with Mr. Jem by my side holding my hand (and huge smile on his face), Dr. W was there. Oh, and the transfer was much, much easier. Overall was such a moving experience. I had tears in my eyes as the little flash of light on the screen as three little guys/gals were inserted in their new cozy home.

Dr. W said my lining looked great and gushed over the quality of the embryos. "The three embryos thawed perfectly. They look like fresh cycle embryos." He expects that they'll implant today.

When we froze them he said we had two "excellent" and one "good" quality embies. Based on that, we decided to transfer all three, as he said the probability of 50-55% of success. Today when he showed us this picture, he said they looked great and couldn't even tell which of the embies was the "good" one and which ones were "excellent."

Judge for yourself!


I had acupuncture before and after the transfer, which really helped my stress level. As I was on the table with the needles in me there was a 4.1 magnitude earthquake! I guess that's what to expect living in the San Francisco Bay Area.

Back at home, I've been resting on the couch, kitties tag-teaming cuddling with me. Hourse reading a Sookie_Stackhouse novel (the latest?), _From_Dead_To_Worst.

And napping.

Heaven.

Extended time off

While everyone else is heading back to work, I've decided to extend my holiday time in preparation for Thursday's FET. Today I had acupuncture and massage. It was so wonderful and relaxing. So relaxing that my eyes were all blurry for a couple of hours afterwards. Wow.

Had a wonderful workout listening to the Glee album. Wow, what a great workout soundtrack! Made me smile the whole time. Had to skip over a couple of the slower tunes. Does that officially make me a Gleek?

7dp5dt: Thank you

Thank you to all the wonderful readers in the blog-o-sphere who have reached out to me with words of encouragement. I am feeling much more hopeful. Yesterday one of my colleague's wife came by the office with their 3-month-old baby girl. As I held her in my arms, sweet baby scent in my nostrils, I felt filled with hope. I could be a mom. I want to be a mom. Yes, it will be complicated (I'm the primary bread-winner). Mr. Jem and I can do this.

It also helped that I had a great night of sleep after a great acupuncture treatment. I was scolded by Dr. Needles for eating so much crappy food. Today I had homemade steel-cut oatmeal for breakies, then soup and whole wheat pasta for lunch and an apple for snack. I'll throw something healthful together tonight.

Thursday beta will tell all. Mr. Jem reminded me last night that we did everything humanly possible to make this work. If it doesn't we have 2 (or 3?) frozen embies waiting for us. If a FET doesn't work, we have more spe.rm from Mr. Jem's biopsy.

Filled with hope, I am.

3dp5dt: Happy / Paranoid

After chugging Gator.ade and eating super salty foods, my OHSS has calmed way down. My weight is still 4 lbs over where I was a week ago, but I think it's from all the calories I'm consuming and the fact that I'm burning almost no calories as I'm relaxing.

That's the happy part.

Here's the paranoid part: My OHSS has calmed down. Does that mean I'm not pregnant and I don't have the KU hormones?

I did have acupuncture yesterday and she said she put in needles to help eliminate the extra water. Mr. Jem and I are doing Moxa to help the blood flow into my uterus.

Have to remember to keep breathing.

Deep breath.

"Gourmet Classics"

Just back from seeing my RE, Dr. W. I'll call him "Dr. Wonderful" from now on, especially after the wonderful news from today's visit.

What's on the menu for today's visit?

As an appetizer, the chef recommends an ultrasound. Main course? Saline ultrasound with a "mock transfer" for dessert, of course. It's the house specialty.

So, I'm waiting for Dr. Wonderful to arrive. I'm naked from the waste down, flimsy paper thing gripped at my waist, sitting on the crinkly paper at the bottom of the examination table, and what do I see? This:


Yes, folks. Those are pot holders over the stirrups. "Gourmet Classics," indeed! I can hear the ad now... "We cook up nothing but the best here at the clinic." I could go on to make omelet jokes, but I'll leave that up to the more humorous blogs (shout out to 999 Reasons to Laugh at Infertility).

So, the wonderful news it that my uterus looks great. No cysts. My ovaries are producing eggs as we speak. The mock transfer was easy and painless. Actually, I barely felt anything!

Dr. Wonderful said he's going to change my Rx to lower doses of meds because things look even better than he had suspected.

Mr Jem and I brought over our test results to the acupuncture clinic associated with the the IF clinic. "Dr. Needle" looked at all the results and gave Mr. Jem vitamins and herbs to take to make his sperm better, swim better. We were both a bit skeptical as we're doing IVF with ICSI, but Dr. Needle reassured us that it should help. Hmmm...

All the same, it's nice to walk out of the clinic smiling.

Jem