Truly the best mothers day ever. My parents are here visiting. I couldn't ask for more help and support. And I totally need it. I live in a strange twilight world, feeding her, changing her, gazing at her tiny features, drinking her very presence up every moment. I have no time for anything else. My life before included work (commute, intellectual and adult conversation, challenges), blogging, commenting on your blogs, reading books, enjoying a slew of favorite TV shows, cuddling my cat, sleep.
My world now: lack of sleep, deep gratitude, abject terror that something horrible will happen to little Rosie. At her two week Pediatric checkup last Thursday she still wasn't back up to her birth weight (she'd lost 13% of her weight), so I've been pumping 4 times a day (during the day - can't face those fiendish, always hungry cones at night) to supplement her sleepy breastfeeding. What do I mean, sleepy? Instead of nursing for 20 minutes, she lingers for around an hour, lazily nursing and just enjoying herself. Let's just say that if you have to nurse every two or three hours and one hour of that time is the nursing, plus another 10 for burping and changing, then 15 for pumping and 10 for cleanup, going pee, that doesn't leave much time for "just sleep when baby does." I'm exhausted, folks. Grateful, happy, terrified with a twinge of bored thrown in. Please don't judge me. It's just that this cycle goes on and on and on.
The good news is that I have this wonderful gift. Rosie.
(This is from 10 days ago, but gives you an idea of her cuteness)
Okay, better get back to it. Birth story to follow, eventually.